.03

Our Services

 
 

mus'tard Lamb BBQ

  • 1/2 cup extra-virgin olive oil

  • 1/4 cup fresh lemon juice

  • 4 garlic cloves, minced

  • 1 tablespoon dried oregano (preferably Greek), crumbled

  • 2 teaspoons salt

  • 1 teaspoon black pepper

  • 1 (4 1/2- to 5-lb) butterflied boneless leg of lamb, trimmed of fat

  • BACONNNNNNnnnnn!!!!!


Date with PBUH Tan

What's up ladies? Unlike his predecessor Muhammad S.A.W, PBUH Tan is not into 9 years old Aisha nor pedophilia. PBUH Tan likes his steak medium-well and Donald Trump likes his steak well-done with ketchup: Medium rare or rare steak make the stomach sick for alot of people.


MMA Match

When we can no longer debate, we will offer MMA charity match to resolve our differences, wherereas the money will go to the charity organization of our choice which could be used to fund terrorist without our knowledge.
 

Zero accountability

In the event where there are terrorist act commited in the name of Tangoism such as Ohm Money Money BOOM, we will bear no responsibilities or whatsoever. However if there is anything positive, it is always because of the beauty of Tango. Tandullilah.
 

Prophecy

Having achieved a 99.99% accuracy rate at predicting the future, it is indeed a very impressive track record, outpacing any other prophet from the past, thus placing Tangoism as the top religion of all time in Guinness world record! PBUH Tan love Guinness stout too!

Exorcism

We will perform exorcism using Tango the holy water and splash it on the possessed victim. There will be extra cost for gender neutral victim because it requires additional effort to identify the victim or demon's voice and gender. 


Baptism

All underage client including infant baby will be baptized by taking a sip of Tango the holy water. Adult client will be baptized with Tango the holy water, mix with liquor of your choice. Gin is recommended.


Grooming

Looking for a nice hair cut like PBUH Tan? You need look no further than Tangoism. Unlike our competition, there are no gangs involve, we are 100% safe and legal. 

I would love to have you (PBUH TAN) as my boss!
— Tommy Robinson, future leader of United Kingdom
 PBUH Tan offering employment contract to Tommy Robinson in Paris, on 20th April 2018. Since then, Tommy has gone rogue.

PBUH Tan offering employment contract to Tommy Robinson in Paris, on 20th April 2018. Since then, Tommy has gone rogue.